Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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