its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
