Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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