We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
