I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
