It's just like the Real World with babies
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
