ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
