First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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