What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
that's an acceptable place to lick
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
