Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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