My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
