That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i would punch a child for taco bell
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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