i can't believe i had my finger in that
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
