mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
