YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
