writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
