This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
your like the ambassador to my penis.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
