this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
You need Xanax blowdarts
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
