I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
