I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
