xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Randomize
