I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
So much rum. So many feels.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Randomize
