and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
