I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
How external is "for external use only"?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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