We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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