I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
