My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
