My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
It's official drugs can't kill me
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
