New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
