Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Randomize
