you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
