she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Randomize
