Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Randomize