No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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