I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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