he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
So squirting runs in the family.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
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