This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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