So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize