I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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