Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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