Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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