i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
