I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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