too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I will pee on everything he values.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
