After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
