the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
i out mim tonsoeep
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