I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
