I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
