ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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