saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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