Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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